i’m really thankful. and not often good at verbalizing that in the ways that i really want to. i’m so thankful for a break from school and a time to really think about and concentrate on the ways in which i want my last (or next to last) semester at app. to look. i’m really thankful for a comfortable and secure place to go back to.. and to come home to. i’m thankful for peace and for the fact that when it’s not always there, it becomes just that much more worth being thankful for. i’m thankful for honesty.. for those people that we all (hopefully) have in our lives that will look us straight in the face and say that there’s something that needs working on… for those people who do love us just the way we are, but too much to let us stay that way. i’m thankful for things that challenge, reshape, and sharpen… for not being able to stay complacent. i’m thankful for silly things that really have no purpose, rhyme, or reason, but are fun anyway. for being able to grow up and make decisions on your own.. and for figuring out all along the way which of those you’re really sure you won’t be making again. for being able to be the toothfairy for my little cousin, and having sweet little hugs and kisses at night from miracle babies. i’m thankful for homecooked meals and presents and words that come straight from the heart in hopes of making your day. and for family and friends who see the not so wonderful sides of you and choose to love you so much anyway. i’m thankful for being able to lead, and to know that there are people who look up to you even if you really can’t wrap your mind around what’s so worthy of looking up to. i’m thankful for being wrong sometimes, because it really helps with the whole “you’ve got so much to learn” part of life. and for those few : ) people who think you’re funny and appreciate the quirks and hang ups that you realize are extremely strange. and for the people who let you talk and talk without just waiting for the times when they can interject something about themselves.. and for learning not to be the person in conversations who does that. : ) i’m thankful for long carrides with people you don’t often get a chance to have good talks with.. because you really learn a lot about yourself and them. and for snuggling and always having something to talk about.. but also when it’s ok if you don’t and can just be quiet. and for grace. and a lord who loves you so much that you’re never ever able to understand how or why. and for the fact that he misses you so much more than you possibly could him when you don’t get time together.. and for getting to a point in life when you feel different and empty when it’s been too long. and for the fact that even when others don’t choose to accept or desire him, it doesn’t make him any less true and real, gracious and loving, forgiving and redeeming, powerful and awesome, unending and almighty. for the fact that i know that… and for the peace and assurance it brings.
happy new year.